Revenge is best served hot, as in a hot cup of coffee. At least that is what Melody Feliciano Johnson apparently thought. After her airman husband filed for divorce, Johnson allegedly used bleach to poison his coffee. Johnson reported to police that her husband sexually assaulted her while he was stationed in Germany, so she was allegedly poisoning him in revenge. What could be worse than that? Your spouse making allegations against you to your commanding officer, that’s what.

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Reporting Family Issues in the Military

Johnson told police that she did not report the sexual abuse to anyone in Germany because her husband threatened to interfere with her background check necessary to get into the United States when he was transferred.

She could have reported the assault to military and civilian authorities, either in Germany or in the United States. Instead, (allegedly), she tried to poison him.

What kind of allegations could your wife make against you to either your command or the local police? Three main criminal acts stand out:

  1. Domestic violence — The generic term “domestic abuse” primarily refers to spousal abuse, and it can occur in several ways: physical, emotional, financial, sexual, psychological, technological, or verbal abuse are all common
  2. Child abuse — Child abuse is a type of domestic abuse and almost always refers to parental violence against minor children within the marriage (though extended family members can also face accusations)
  3. Elder abuse — If the parents or grandparents of either spouse live in the marital home (to receive care, reduce expenses, be near grandchildren, and so on), they could be targets of abuse from either spouse

In Virginia, civilian authorities have many legal tools to move against a person accused of any of those crimes. For your spouse to take an allegation of misconduct to your command and not to local authorities could reveal an underhanded motive: she does not want legal trouble, she wants to destroy your career.

Military Protective Orders (MPOs) & Protective Orders (POs)

Some spouses, recognizing the inconsistency of running to a CO and not the police, will file allegations in both places. Then the military can issue an MPO or Military Protective Order — DD Form 2873 — against you.

Your CO is responsible for issuing this order, but if the CO turns down your spouse’s request for the MPO, the refusal is sent up to the Military Installation Commander for a final decision.

Meanwhile, civilian authorities can issue one of three types of Protective Orders. Either the Juvenile and Domestic Relations District Court (for family members) or the General District Court having jurisdiction over your place of residency can issue these orders:

  1. Emergency protective order (EPO)
  2. Preliminary protective order (PPO)
  3. Permanent protective order (PO)

You can see you are getting hemmed in from both directions — your CO has acted on your spouse’s accusation and limited your freedom on base, and the local civilian court has limited your freedom off base.

A civilian PO generally limits you to keeping your distance from the alleged victim (your spouse or family member). “No contact” POs include reaching out to the alleged victim in any way (email, text, snail mail, or through friends).

What Does a Military Protective Order Do?

A military protective order is unlike a civilian PO in that it is not recognized as legally binding outside the military. Your spouse cannot ask the local police to arrest you for violating the MPO, for example.

The CO issuing the MPO is also the one who can rescind it; a local civilian judge has no authority to act on the MPO.

Your CO could order you to take certain measures:

  • The MPO restricts communication (face-to-face, telephone, fax, email, text, or letters) between the protected persons and you, either directly or by way of third parties
  • The MPO is also a physical restraint; you cannot approach the alleged victim and the victim’s family (in most cases, your family); your CO can order you to stay away from specific places at specific times
  • The MPO can require you to vacate your military residence if the protected person lives there
  • You may receive temporary housing from the military, but that is not guaranteed
  • Your CO may require you to enroll in counseling, surrender your weapons, and perform other actions the CO feels are necessary

An Allegation is Not A Conviction

Devastating and life-altering as the twin allegations may be, neither is the final verdict. Sure, your spouse has completely wrecked your life for the moment. You may be prevented from seeing your kids, talking to your spouse, or even staying in base housing or your marital home.

It’s awful, and nobody will say otherwise, but it is not the end of your legal fight.

On the civilian side, you need a good family law attorney to help combat unfair and untrue allegations. No matter the topic, a lawyer is your strongest ally as you set about disproving your spouse’s allegations.

Your Commanding Officer and You

Your CO has little choice in issuing an MPO if your spouse makes allegations against you. The CO must err on the side of caution, but can refuse to issue the MPO if your spouse’s claims are not credible.

But your CO is neither your marriage counselor or lawyer. You need to look elsewhere for emotional or legal help when confronted with a civilian PO and an MPO. Your CO can still help:

  • Be completely honest with your CO; if your marriage is in upheaval, do not pretend all is well
  • Ask your CO for concrete actions you can take to minimize the effects of the two protective orders on your military career, and then act on those suggestions
  • Do not whine or unload on your CO; keep your conversations brief and grounded in facts
  • Ask for a realistic time frame for the MPO to be lifted; who will investigate your spouse’s claims, when will you be given a chance to rebut them, and how soon can you return to regular duty?

While your marriage may be crumbling and you are understandably devastated, think about your CO’s perspective: you are one small part of the CO’s command, and you are unlikely to occupy very much real estate of the CO’s mind. Do not assume the CO will be as consumed as you are regarding the allegations against you.

Call The Firm For Men

A civilian family law attorney can help you confront and resolve allegations that generate a civilian PO, but the same evidence can also be presented to lift the MPO. Your lawyer is your strongest weapon against improper allegations. And, if the allegations are true, your lawyer can help you deal with the legal and military consequences. The Firm For Men stands ready to help Virginia’s men in every type of family law matter. Contact us today or call our office at (757) 383-9184.