John C. Depp II v. Amber Laura Heard is one of the more famous cases of the Fairfax County Circuit Court. The oddest moment in the defamation trial may have been a video deposition of Alejandro Romero. Mr. Romero responded to oral questions while vaping and driving. You can (and should) prepare better for your divorce deposition.

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Depositions and Interrogatories in Discovery

Discovery in Virginia legal cases includes depositions and interrogatories:

  • Discovery is a critical stage in the legal process, serving as the formal mechanism for parties involved in a lawsuit to exchange relevant information regarding witnesses and evidence intended for presentation during trial. It is essentially the phase where both sides “discover” or uncover the facts and evidence that each intends to rely upon to support their respective claims or defenses.
  • A deposition is a crucial component of the pre-trial discovery process in legal proceedings. It involves the sworn testimony of a party or witness, given orally and recorded verbatim. Typically conducted in a formal setting, such as a law office or conference room, a deposition allows attorneys from both sides of a case to ask questions of the deponent under oath.
  • An interrogatory is a fundamental component of the discovery process in civil procedure, designed to facilitate the exchange of information and evidence between parties involved in a legal dispute. It is essentially a list of written questions that one party sends to another party, seeking specific information relevant to the case at hand. Interrogatories are governed by the rules of civil procedure and are typically served on the opposing party after the commencement of litigation.

Depositions are deceptively close to a conversation, while interrogatories are uncomfortably like a test made up only of essay questions. Your divorce attorney will help you craft written answers to interrogatories and warn you against getting comfortable with depositions.

Are there Limits on Interrogatories & Depositions?

Depositions are always oral — you are asked something, and you answer out loud, under oath. Interrogatories are always written — you receive up to 30 questions and must answer them, under oath, in writing and within the time frame provided by the court.

Depositions are not limited in number. You can be asked dozens of questions about every aspect of your life in a divorce deposition. The opposing party’s attorney (your spouse is the opposing party) will try to push you past your limits:

  • Force you to admit something you do not want to say
  • Confuse you regarding the order of marital moments, who said what, or what your behavior was during events
  • Test your knowledge of very granular details, like the names of your children’s doctors, teachers, and friends or the precise dates of some long-ago gatherings
  • Trip you up by causing you to overlook a particular investment account or retirement fund as you slog through a long mental list of them
  • Question your workplace performance, average length of past jobs, and annual income over your career
  • Probe your physical and mental health to exploit any indication you may not be a fit parent
  • Stress you with mental arithmetic in giving a cumulative value of complicated things: your marital home, vacation home, timeshare, and vehicles; your lifetime earnings; your total net worth

Sample Divorce Deposition Questions

Brace, brace, brace! We are by now all uncomfortably familiar with flight attendants chanting, “Brace, Brace, Brace” in aircraft emergencies. You must brace yourself for despicable divorce deposition questions from opposing counsel.

Opposing counsel will use a variety of techniques to imply some bad behavior:

  • Instead of asking, “Have you ever been to a swinger’s party?” the lawyer may ask, “Isn’t it true that you expressed to your spouse on such-and-such a date X years ago that you want to go to swingers’ parties?”
  • Rather than ask, “Where have you hidden your off-shore accounts?” the attorney may ask, “How would a person in your position go about moving money to offshore accounts?”
  • Another common strategy to rattle your nerves is to ask for a nearly impossible recollection of past events: “Didn’t you tell your spouse 19 months ago on a Tuesday night at around 7:45 p.m. that you gambled away the mortgage money?” Nobody hearing your deposition expects you (or anyone else) to recall such a moment vividly or accurately, but you are tainted with an aura of doubt just from the question.
  • Many questions will be of the “Damned if you do, damned if you don’t” variety: “Isn’t it true you deliberately worked a lot of overtime and neglected your children, using as an excuse your desire to lower your debt?” Working overtime to reduce marital debt is now a bad thing, because you saw your kids less. Or, you ignored mounting bills to fritter away time playing with your children.

Some typical nasty nonsense that may come your way:

  • Your sexual history and life — Are you an adulterer? How many times did you visit strip clubs or brothels last year? Have you ever paid for sex? Do you take medication for sexual performance? Have you ever had an STI or STD?
  • Your finances — Could a forensic accountant find discrepancies in your accounts? Would you know how to hide assets? Are you certain you provided full disclosure on all your accounts?
  • Your work history — How many jobs have you had in the past decade? What was the annual income of your first job, and what is your current annual income? What hours do you work? Could you leave work on short notice to help your sick child? How many times have you been laid off or fired?
  • Your mental health — Do you abuse prescription drugs? Are you now seeing or have you ever seen a mental health professional? Do you recall any unusual incidents witnessed by your children on such-and-such a date at such-and-such an event?
  • Your physical health — How many operations have you had as an adult? Have you ever been hospitalized? How many alcoholic drinks do you consume per day or week? Are you able to lift your minor children? How many sick days did you take last year? The year before? How much of the marital income do you spend on yourself for gym memberships, athletic equipment, or fitness products?
  • You and the law — Have you ever used nonprescription drugs? How many times have you been arrested? Convicted? Would you know how to buy illegal drugs? Are you currently enrolled in AA or Gamblers Anonymous? Do you currently inject, inhale, or ingest any illegal substances?

Keep Calm During a Deposition

Above all else, keep cool. Do not let opposing counsel rattle you! Your experienced divorce attorney will prepare you for questioning by practicing with you. That rehearsal may be unpleasant for you but embrace the opportunity to try staying calm and collected.

During questioning, your attorney can speak up on your behalf, but only if you pause and let your attorney do the talking. Lawyers are not called “mouthpieces” for nothing!

Some additional helpful hints if you want to learn how to stay calm during a deposition:

  • Review the key areas of contention in your particular case
  • Answer the question and only the question you are asked; when finished, be quiet
  • Keep your hands in your lap if you do not know what to do with them; if you usually talk with your hands, sit on them
  • Words you do not speak cannot come back to harm you; the opposing counsel may try to use silence as a weapon, but do not take that bait and try to fill the silence with your ill-chosen words
  • Be honest; if you cannot recall something, say so, but if you can, answer honestly
  • Expect the same question to be repeated, so stay consistent with your answers
  • If challenged with something like mental arithmetic or recalling decades-old events, admit you cannot do it; do not guess or boast
  • Take all the time you need to review any paper presented to you; nobody can force you to read faster or skim (opposing counsel may be hoping you ignore something that appears in writing)

Trusting your capable family law attorney is key. The Firm For Men can be trusted to assist Virginia men in all aspects of divorce, including depositions. Contact us today or telephone us at (757) 383-9184 to arrange an initial consultation.