If you are in the midst of divorce season, you may not have time to binge-watch HBO’s supremely sought-after, six-season slaughter spree, Game of Thrones (GoT). Fear not; we can provide a thoroughly clear summary of all the characters and all 60 episodes with our next 147 articles … [editor’s note: no you can’t] … Due to circumstances beyond our control, we cannot, so please allow us instead to show you how your divorce is exactly like GoT (except for where it is not).
Divorce is Not a Zero-Sum Game
Divorce is not a zero-sum game. Your win need not come at the expense of your ex-wife’s loss. You both can get on with your lives and share responsibilities, faults, and finances equitably. Your attorney can skip the drama and get to the details.
The challenge, of course, depends on perspective.
In GoT, the nobles view all their lands, riches and rewards as a zero-sum game. Only one king can sit on the Iron Throne. Only one ruler can rule over the Seven Kingdoms. It’s always about the one who takes from the rest.
From the view of all the underlings in GoT — the spies, peasants, priests and courtiers — life is not a zero-sum game. The crowd mainly wants to keep living, despite the odds, and they are not so ambitious as to think they have to take from others in order to survive. In real-life here in Virginia, you are one of the crowd. Enjoy it. The stakes are high, but you will survive, and even flourish, with the right lawyer.
A divorce lawyer for men can help you see how some straightforward paperwork (sent by process servers, not ravens) can settle complex issues with no need for spears:
- Child custody, support and visitation
- Property settlement
- Separation agreement
- Spousal support
With the help of your attorney, you can stand in the third-floor dormer window of your Virginia Beach home and survey your quarter-acre domain to your heart’s content (just keep an eye out for giants and wight walkers).
It’s Not All About Land
In GoT, literally everything is about land—who will invade, defend, and acquire land. While the various kings of the northern lands bicker, overrun each other’s castles, and kill off each other’s relatives, far away Daenerys Targaryen amasses a formidable army founded in freedom. Of all the aspiring rulers, we give her the best odds because she has a vast army, an enormous navy, lots of treasure, and, oh yeah, three dragons.
Your Virginia divorce has no dragons. Nobody needs to be an enemy, and you do not need to grab all the land. Your attorney can defend you with court papers, not shields and swords. You may have to compromise (a concept not often found in GoT) so your ex-wife gets real property and you get money to find a new home. Your attorney could make you a winner on your own throne, but your throne could be gold, iron, or porcelain.
Will You Choose Intrigue or Diplomacy?
Intrigue is a running theme in GoT. Every noble is constantly intriguing, plotting and scheming against every other noble. Alliances are built and destroyed.
Your Virginia attorney can take all your righteous indignation and anger and channel it toward building a better future for you, for the children you and your ex-wife created, and even for your ex-wife. You may go into a divorce bitter and embattled, but with the right attorney — the Hand of the King, if you will — you can move past the emotions and emerge from it all victorious (and divorced).
One way to do this is by sitting down and agreeing to simple constructs before you ever go before a judge. Agreeing on property settlement is one small way to smooth out the transition from quarreling couple to separated singles. If you two have children, scheduling visitation days, hours and seasons in writing shows a judge you two are serious, not Cersei and King Robert.
It’s Not Good to Be a King
If GoT teaches you nothing else, it should demonstrate (repeatedly, violently) that being king (or queen) is not so hot. Your divorce attorney can help to rein in your loftier notions to reign over your divorce, while still making you a winner.
Winning a real divorce case requires brains, not brawn. Say you fancy yourself as strong as Sandor Clegane when you are really more the Tommen Baratheon type. Your attorney can take on the role of Tyrion Lannister and counsel you wisely in the ways not of Westeros, but of Williamsburg. You will not win against your ex-wife by knocking heads together, but by putting heads together.
We may not be Maesters of Aemon’s or Luwin’s caliber, but we at The Firm For Men know the law. Contact us today or call us at 757-383-9184 to speak with one of our attorneys. We serve all of Hampton Roads’ seven kingdoms and more, from Virginia Beach, Norfolk, and Chesapeake to Hampton and Newport News!
Wildlings welcome; no ravens after five, please.